I’ve always been naturally quiet since I was a kid. I struggled to make friends at school and found socialising quite difficult (please don’t judge). As a result of these struggles, I became very shy, awkward and introverted. It was during sixth form (A-Levels) that I started to come out of my shell and feel comfortable in my own skin. By the time I was in university, I had built up a little more confidence and made new friends, reached out to mentors and applied to internships. I thought I had overcome my awkward introverted phase and was making big girl moves. Boy was I wrong. It was during my first role straight out of the gates from university that I realised that I was still very much that introverted girl. It also didn’t help that my first job wasn’t inclusive and that I experienced microagressions and racism, which made me less open with my colleagues.
After university, I had secured a PR and Communications internship, a role that required a high level skill in written and oral communication. I soon learnt that in comms that doing the work wasn’t enough but communicating effectively and overhyping everything you did put you in favour with your manager and senior stakeholder. For example, I wouldn’t make a big deal about updating the website or an interview I had done with a lecturer or student. I’d just do it and let my manager know when it had been completed. It was during team meetings that I noticed that other people would take credit for my work or would confidently speak about the smallest thing they were doing in their role. My fear of speaking in front of large groups of people and not knowing exactly what to say about my work kept me in silence. My manager knew what I was doing so in my head I thought it was enough. But it wasn’t. Soon I was labelled the ‘quiet girl’ and was asked to speak more in team meetings. I did speak up but only when I thought it was relevant. However, I knew that I had to do it more frequently.
As an introvert, it’s very easy to get looked over and not be valued. It feels like we have to go the extra mile to prove that we are equally as good as our extroverted counterparts. This is even more of a challenge if you’re a black woman as we often get labelled ‘unfriendly and ‘intimidating’ if we don’t play up to the ‘loud’ and ‘bubbly’ black girl character. To get over this I’ve learnt a few tricks along the way (I’m still learning).
- Write down what you will say in meetings
I’ve learnt that being prepared before any meeting will help you articulate your ideas much better and also clam down any nerves. I hate having to talk in meetings but contributing to at least one topic will show that you’re engaged and a team player. It doesn’t have to be much. Ask a question or make a statement. It’s better than staying completely silent.
2. Step out of your comfort zone
I’ve made it a goal to do something that challenges me at least once a quarter. I don’t like presenting but I’ve made it a point to do one presentation to really push myself out of my comfort zone. Whatever your fear or weakness is, address it by doing something that challenges you.
3. Learn to over communicate
I’m very much a put your head down and get the work done kind of person. As I mentioned above, it sometimes isn’t good enough. I was recently advised to over communicate when in doubt. This is something I’m learning and have started to implement. Over communicate at all times and keep everyone in the loop on what you’re doing. Even the small stuff. And don’t forget to hype it up and make yourself sound like a complete genius (fake it till you make it).
As a marketing professional being introverted can be a challenge at times but this shouldn’t hold us back from climbing the corporate ladder. Remember diversity in personalities and thinking should be embraced by any company and if you feel that you’re not feeling valued, you should speak with your manager or look for another role.
See you in my next post!
